Past Transgressions: A Russian Roulette Love Story Read online

  I’d been with Micha for years, she was arm candy and a good fuck. She knew how to stroke my ego and keep me company. When I left the mob, I left everything that Micha wanted from me, money and material things. I struggled to get my club off the ground and Micha wasn’t going to stick around, she wanted to live a lifestyle I could no longer afford for her.

  Now my club was the most popular, I was back at the top, but doing it in a way that wouldn’t land me in prison. I’d returned to driving nice cars and ruling the city with my riches. Micha wanted back in, but I knew her motives, and I wasn’t going to entertain them.

  “Can’t I just come visit you, see the club?”

  I laughed at her false innocence.

  “I don’t see why that is funny, Alexei?” she questioned, crossing her arms over her silicone filled chest.

  “I think you know exactly why it is funny, Micha.” I stood firm, voice unwavering.

  When it was over, I admitted to myself that I never loved her. I’d never been with a woman that I could honestly say I loved. Love wasn’t in my cards or agenda, and that was fine with me. All I wanted was a warm body for a night or two, the warmth of Rae intrigued me. I wondered all she could do and all she wanted me to do.

  From the look in Rae’s eyes as she chatted over her drink, I knew she ached for more than innocent conversation. She needed to be fucked, and she needed it badly, I could almost smell it, taste it, and feel it.

  “Alexei, I’m speaking. Are you listening?” Micha’s voice broke through my daydream of Rae, I could nearly hear her sweet voice screaming my name at the height of passion, yet it was broken by Micha’s annoying voice.

  “I’m not. I’m simply waiting for you to leave.”

  “It was a waste coming down here.” Micha threw her arms into the air in frustration, the jingle of her many bracelets accompanying her movements.

  “Apparently it was, goodbye.” I had nothing else to say to the gold digging whore.

  I didn’t even take the time to watch her leave as I turned towards the door behind the bar that led to my office. I closed the door behind me, silencing the click of Micha’s heels.

  My body plopped down into the leather office chair. There was a stack of papers left on my desk in my dim office. My accounting wasn’t going to do itself. With a sigh, I found my glasses, put them on, and got to work.

  Though at work my mind wandered to Rae. She was on the quiet side, the opposite of my loud and overly excited cousin. Something told me she was a good girl, but through her polished quiet exterior, there was a bad girl waiting to emerge.

  My cell phone rang again, the same number. I knew what they wanted, and the answer was still the same, no.

  Securing the button on my sleeve. I ran my hands over the material of my dark blue button up shirt. The music was already pounding below, and from my window, I saw the crowds gathering outside to be allowed in.

  Friday night in St. Petersburg and my club was the place everyone wanted to be. I took pride in knowing I’d built something strong and something that appeared to be lasting. So many clubs came and went in a matter of weeks or months, but Oblivion had surpassed the typical expiration date, it was in St. Petersburg to stay.

  I prided myself on having the best view of the city from my penthouse apartment above the club. I’d made this place into a sanctuary near my place of business.

  Turning from the window, I stepped through the apartment and towards the elevator. It was time to be all business and run my club to my specifications.

  Running Oblivion gave me a high that was similar to the sickening high I’d get when I completed a job. There was this strange elation that came with stopping a man’s heart. I was able to find that elation in my club. Though tonight I had an extra kick to my high, I’d be seeing Rae.

  In the elevator, I checked my phone. An abundance of missed calls filled my log. I deleted every single one of them, none were important to me.

  “Fuck this,” I growled to myself.

  From the moment I arrived and the doors to the elevator opened, I was blasted with the loud music and the sounds of nightlife. Girls were dancing in short skirts, guys were watching them and eager to get them into bed. The drinks were already flowing, and I was the king of the castle.

  “A little bird told me that you were ignoring phone calls,” a voice that I hadn’t heard in quite some time said clearly from behind.

  I whirled around to find the man who kept the heart of my cousin hostage, Igor.

  He stood looking smug in a black suit and red tie, his signature look. A smirk lined his lips as I observed him stand there, still as skinny as ever, I could snap him like a twig.

  “I don’t know what kind of birds you talk to, but they are you are no friend of mine,” I snapped.

  “Tsk, tsk. You know when the boss makes a request, you get it done, in the family or not.”

  “Fuck the family,” I growled.

  Igor hadn’t always been this way. Yes, he’s been loyal to the family, but at the same time, he was eager to branch out and get away from the lifestyle. It was all my fault that he’d been dragged in. I’d taken him under my wing, and now he could fly, but was flying in the wrong direction.

  “I’m here to do you a favor. I know you don’t want trouble, I know you well Drug,” Igor expressed, calling me his friend only made me angry. Igor was no friend of mine.

  I stepped to him, my face only inches from his. “Get out of my club.”

  “I told you, I mean no harm. I’m trying to help you.”

  “I don’t need your fucking help, you piece of shit!”

  “Okay, I can only say I’ve tried.” Igor gave a simple shrug and turned away, but only for a split second before he faced me once more. “How is Katya by the way? I know she is in town. She’s expressed getting together, but I know how you feel about us.”

  “Good, keep away from her. She doesn’t need the likes of you. She deserves better than a pile of dog shit.”

  “I want to see her. I haven’t seen her in a long time. You might not believe it, but I do love Katya, there have just been complications,” Igor expressed.

  “Complications my ass, you’ve broken her heart more than once. I don’t need you doing it again,” I noted sternly.

  “I know.” Igor glanced to the ground, I swore I saw a flash of guilt. He needed to feel guilty, he’d done enough damage as it was.

  “There is no time for you and your bullshit agenda around here, I have a business to run. Now, I’m asking you to get out of my face and leave. Don’t ever come here delivering messages for them again, if they want me, they can find me themselves. Though while you are on the subject of delivering messages, tell them to leave my fucking family out of it. If they call my mother again, there will be regrets.”

  I had nothing else to say to him, I walked away.

  My phone buzzed, it was a text from my driver, he was headed to pick up Katya and Rae. The night that started off as shit was right with me once again. I was eager to see Rae in her VIP best. She was an innocent angel that needed a little corrupting on my end, I’d do my best.

  Chapter 5

  Rae

  Watching my reflection, I wasn’t sure if I should regret letting Katya give me a makeover or if I should be thanking her.

  Spending time dressed up wasn’t my norm, but for once in a very long time, I felt like I was someone to be desired and I had just the guy in mind who I wanted to desire me.

  I’d allowed Katya to convince me into the hot pink dress she picked out while we were shopping. The dress was strapless with hot pink leopard print. It was outside of my norm, and for once I was feeling adventurous, I was on vacation after all.

  My friend had given my lids a pink shade and my lips glossed over in a pink tint. My earrings big and weighing down on my ears.

  I turned to the side to observe my shape in the dress. My boobs were hugged tight at the top and my cleavage nearly spilling over. Though the dress flared out from the top, my overs
ized behind still made a nice impression in the dress.

  I worked to reposition my the curls Katya had put into my long hair. I knew I would be doing it often as night went, I wasn’t one to wear my hair down often.

  “I have jealous of your tits,” Katya informed me as she joined me in the mirror, fluffing her blonde curls.

  Tonight, we were twins at Katya wore the same dress at me, but in highlighter yellow. She didn’t fill out her dress as I did, but she still looked absolutely stunning, though it was impossible for her to not look like Russian Barbie.

  “We hope Alexei cannot keep hands off you. I put many condoms in bag.” Katya wasn’t going to give up on her mission, maybe her mission was exactly what I needed.

  This trip was intended for me to get out of the funk I’d discovered myself in. All I did was work and go to school. I was also engaged, until two months prior. My ex insisted that his cheating was my fault as I was never around.

  The man I thought would be the one for me to spend my life with was never one to understand my reasons behind working so hard. He insisted that my mom and sister could care for themselves. He never even took the time to get to know them and only made assumptions about them, but I still loved him, that was until I showed up at his apartment unannounced and found him in bed with someone else.

  Since my breakup, there was a spirit of hopelessness that lingered around me. Katya was who kept me from falling into the deep end, she kept me sane with her insanity. The trip was to be my shock back into reality. There was a possibility my reality did involve a quick hookup, it was time for a little spontaneity in my life, this good girl needed to let loose.

  “I don’t see why you’re jealous, you look like a goddess like always,” I noted to my friend who picked up her clutch purse from the bed.

  “I do okay, but you have ass and tits. I have flat Russian body.”

  “A perfect body.”

  Katya looked down at her phone.

  “The driver is here,” she announced excitedly.

  The two of us left the apartment behind and were greeted by a black Escalade out front. The driver opened the door and allowed the two of us into the warmth of the car. I was still trying to figure out how Russian girls went out in the middle of winter wearing practically nothing, I apparently had a lot to learn.

  Anxiety set in as I knew we were getting close to the club. I wondered about Alexei. The way he looked at me was telling, he had an attraction, but I wasn’t sure exactly how strong it was.

  I wanted him, though, there was a possibility he didn’t want me in the same way. I kept my fingers crossed though. Katya was convinced that her cousin ached to get me into his bed, I wasn’t exactly sure of her hunch, but I was one to second guess everything. I was responsible, something Katya threw out the window at times.

  The car pulled in front of the building Katya and I had been in earlier in the day, though now it was surrounded by a line of people, all eager to get inside the hot night club.

  From the moment we stepped from the black SUV, the boom of the music hit me. The chatter of the patrons awaiting entrance filled the air as Katya and I passed the line completely and stepped to the front door, receiving nasty looks as we went.

  Approaching the door, Katya chatted with the bouncer who looked at a list on his clipboard. In mere seconds he lifted the velvet rope and allowed us in. The jeers coming from those in line caused a smile to come to my face, it was as if Katya and I were over privileged celebrities.

  Another bouncer approached us and spoke to Katya.

  “He is taking us to the VIP section,” Katya announced to me.

  The club was much different when in full swing. The place I’d seen abandoned in the daytime was now filled to capacity. Bodies grinding on the dance floor and drinks flowing in abundance.

  Katya and I were led to a velvet rope at a small glass staircase that led to a landing that overlooked the dance floor. We had multiple couches and a table filled with bottles of alcohol.

  I took a seat on the dark purple couch, and Katya right away handed me a glass of clear liquid. I put my nose to the glass, taking a sniff.

  “Vodka,” Katya announced as she poured her own glass before raising it. “Na zdorovie.”

  “Na zdorovie,” I added knowing the Russian expression, as Katya used it often.

  Tipping the glass to my lips, I shot down the clear liquid that warmed my throat right away as I swallowed it down feeling the hiss of the alcohol. It was almost instant that I felt my body loosen. Katya gave me a grin as she poured more for the both of us.

  After a few more shots, I had the feeling that I could rule the world. My tolerance for alcohol was very low, and the Russian vodka was already taking its toll on me. I had no shame in being a lightweight.

  My eyes scanned the lower level of the club, eager to find Alexei. I saw couples and friends dancing their hearts away, bumping and grinding with potential partners of the night, the bartenders pouring shots, and there, I saw him.

  He stood just next to the bar, scanning the room. His shirt was a dark color, and like times before, it gave a great view of his muscular body. A bouncer went in his direction, whispering something in his ear before his eyes shot up and from across the room, they met mine. I bit down hard on my lip.

  I turned around to see Katya on the couch with a guy I hadn’t realized entered our section. He was thin, long nose, and dressed in a full suit with red tie. Katya looked at the guy, her eyes filled with pure lust as he ran his hand along her leg.

  “Rae, come,” Katya called from the couch. I approached her and the man she sat with.

  I studied the man, though he gave me a glance, he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes or hands off Katya.

  “This is Igor,” Katya proudly announced as she leaned into the man, his lips kissing her neck.

  They’d only been reunited for minutes, and Katya was already under his spell. My best friend was practically drooling over the guy she’d been in love with for a number of years.

  Igor said something to Katya in Russian, she nodded in response as she stood.

  “Will be back,” Katya said before Igor took her by her waist and led her down the staircase from the VIP area. I was left alone.

  I poured myself a shot of vodka and took it down before looking over the dancefloor once again. I swayed my body to the music while I stood alone.

  The warmth of a hand settled on my hip causing me to jump, my heart in my throat I sharply turned to come face to face with Alexei. My hands settled on his chest, under my hands his chest was hard, I inhaled sharply.

  “You like club now?” Alexei questioned, his hand not leaving my hip, only gripping at me tighter.

  “It’s definitely more alive than earlier,” I noted slyly.

  “Come.” Alexei began to lead me to the couch that was once occupied by Katya and Igor before their departure.

  Willingly, I went with him. He hadn’t just intrigued me, but drew me in to a point that I craved more. I’d been entrapped in his voodoo, and I couldn’t wait for his next trick.

  Alexei sat on the couch, pulling me into his lap. I glanced down at his face while his thumb ran over my cheek. Shivers ran down my spine at his strong hands on me, cradling me, claiming me.

  “You enjoy today?” Alexei inquired, pulling me in closer to speak into my ear.

  I nodded as his lips brushed against my earlobe.

  “It is strange though, at home it is Christmas, but not here,” I noted as December 25th was not Christmas Day in Russia.

  “At home, what do you today?” It was impossible to not fall or his broken English. Every time I spoke with him, I adored the way he formed his sentences.

  “I’d likely be working.”

  “Working? Why no with family?”

  “I need the money. I have to pay for school, my rent, bills, and I help my mom with her bills. I rarely make it home for holidays,” I explained to him. It’d been at least two years since I’d spent a holiday with my family.r />
  “You work much.”

  “I do, but in the end, I think it will be worth it.”

  “It was a wish for me, study at university.”

  “Why didn’t you?” I asked of him, eager to learn why he didn’t follow that particular dream.

  “Life,” he simply answered.

  Knowing exactly what he was talking about, I nodded. Life always seemed to get in the way. I always wanted to see the world sooner, spend my summers volunteering, and maybe learning a language, but there it was: life.

  This trip was my chance to give life the middle finger and tell it to fuck off for once. My chains had been broken, and I was allowed my moments of freedom.

  Katya had been right, I needed this time. I could let my hair down, have a casual hook up, and be the girl I normally wasn’t. I’d left logical and responsible Rae back in Seattle. In Russia, I was adventurous and sexy Rae, out on the prowl and living out my fantasies, I was starting with Alexei. Goodbye, Ms. Responsible.

  “Would you like to dance?” I asked Alexei, putting my insecurities behind me.

  “Dance, I don’t.”

  “Seriously? You own a club. Let’s dance!” I stood from Alexei’s lap and pulled his hand.

  The ice blue of Alexei’s eyes met mine, and the sliver of a smile inched onto his lips. He shook his head, but stood with me. I grinned at getting the big strong guy that he was to go along with me.

  Pulling Alexei along, we left the VIP section and scaled down the stairs towards the dance floor.

  Bodies were moving rhythmically all around us on the packed floor. I was pressed against Alexei, his hands on my hips. It was a now or never moment. Moving with the beat, I began to dance.

  Though hesitant, Alexei joined me. The vodka had definitely kicked in, and I felt invincible as I began to work up a sweat, grinding and gyrating with the man I’d found myself lustful for.

  The strength of Alexei’s grip on my behind, pulling me in close. His eyes never breaking contact with my own, and his arousal pressing against my stomach. My eyes instantly shut, it was all a little too much at once. My breathing shallow and mind feeling faint.